Monday, January 13, 2014

You are loved.

I am loved. 
Sometimes I forget that, unfortunately. If I give myself just a little time to sit down and really think, I realize... I am loved. There are people out there who do care about me. Unlike what I always thought. 

I cried tonight. 
As I think about them, I cried. How could I not see? The words from a dear person came back to me, making the tears flow even more faster. She had asked me once before, 
"Do you remember? You used to ask me why I'm always so nice towards you?"

I was intrigued, so badly, when she said that. I'd asked her, 
Because I did forgot. Her answer strikes my core. 

"Because Allah loves you." 
Wallahu'alam. I wished, I really really wished it's true. Subhanallah... 
Who wouldn't want to be loved by their own Creator??

I almost cried that day. I cried now though. 

I was packing. I went through all of my stuff to sort them all nice and neat. That was when I found all these pieces, left here and there by them. Pieces of their love towards me. Yes, the feelings can be in varying degree from each one of them, yet the fact that they did thought of me, even a little, is enough.

There's a book... that same dear person had let me borrowed it for a bit, not a long time ago. A book written by our own Muslim scholar. He did mentioned something along the line of 
'When you love/care about so-and-so, then tell them.' 
Tell them. Say it. Don't hide it. 

By Allah, I had the experience of being on the receiving end of such confession and the feeling is indescribable! Until today, even with her flaws -she's still human after all-, the only thing I always remember of her is of her kindness. The words that come out from my mouth when describing her had been positive almost every time if not already every single time! If she said she's being nice towards me because Allah loves me, then for sure I can say the same towards her. Subhanallah...

I know of other people whom the only thing I can think of is their faults and I'd have to consciously shut my mouth, very tightly!, afraid that I might end up bad mouthing them... and that is so not allowed.

I'm sure... you are loved as well. 
Have you tried it? Sit down and ponder? If you can't think of anyone, then let it be known, as long as you're a Muslim then you are loved. 
I love you. 
Do I really? Of course. After all, I always prayed for you minimum 5 times a day. 
Each time twice I mentioned you. 

السَّلاَمُ عَلَيْكَ أَيُّهَا النَّبِيُّ وَرَحْمَةُ اللهِ وَبَرَكاَتُهُ السَّلاَمُ عَلَيْنَا وَعَلَى عِبَادِ اللهِ الصَّالِحِيْنَ 
Sejahtera atas engkau wahai Nabi dan rahmat Allah serta keberkatannya.
Sejahtera ke atas kami dan atas hamba-hamba Allah yang soleh.

And I'm not the only one.